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The Purpose of the
Engagement and Wedding Rituals
The engagement period is a standard ritual
for almost all couples who wish to marry.
What is the significance and importance of this engagement period?
Why do couples who wish to marry need this time of waiting for the
ceremony?
When two adults agree to wed the engagement period begins. The
engagement period is the time between the formal acceptance of the
proposal and the actual marriage ceremony. During this time the man
is referred to as the woman’s fiancé while the woman is called the
man’s fiancée.
Engagement rings are usually worn by those who are in the engagement
period. While wedding rings are exchanged during the formal marriage
ceremonies, engagement rings are different in appearance and are
often exchanged during the proposal. Most engagement rings are worn
on the fourth finger of the left hand.
There are numerous legends and theories about the origins of
engagement rings. Most agree that they began when Holy Roman Emperor
Maximilian I gave one to Mary of Burgundy as his engagement gift in
1477. The Romans are said to have believed that the vein in the
fourth finger of the left hand led directly to the heart, thus
beginning the tradition of wearing the ring on the fourth finger.
For many couples this is one of the most memorable periods of their
lives. This is the time where they begin to seriously prepare for
their future roles as spouses. Since they are preparing for their
new life together their relationship naturally deepens and shifts.
The engagement period allows couples to take time to seriously
discuss their future lives together including family, jobs, and
dreams. It also allows them the time they need to make all the
preparations for the wedding ceremony.
The couple begins to be accepted as husband and wife the moment they
become engaged. As they begin to assume their roles and
responsibilities as husband and wife their relationship takes on a
new intimacy and closeness.
The work of preparing for the wedding will demand that the couples
spend an increased amount of time with each other. They have a
variety of task to complete so that their wedding day will be
wonderful, and begin to be treated as husband and wife by those they
work with. They may also begin the search for their new home
together.
All of these activities serve to bring them closer to each other and
each others families. Once their engagement is formally announced,
some couple even choose to begin living with one another.
Couple who live apart may also become engaged if their intention is
to get married at some later time. At least one of the partners will
need to move so that the couple can be together. The process of
moving can be a stressful time in the life of the couple as
adjustments to a new community and perhaps a new job are made. There
is no set length of time for an engagement period, and it is often
determined by cultural or religious customs.
Formal announcements to family, friends, and communities are often
made by newly engaged couples. Sometimes this formal announcement is
accompanied by a party or other informal gathering. It is often
customary for guests to bring gifts for the newly engaged couple
when attending these gatherings.
The terms betrothal and engagement have been interchangeably used
throughout history. The term betrothal usually indicates a more
formal agreement that involves families and communities as well as
the couple. For couples with arranged marriages the term betrothal
is usually used to describe the period of time between the formal
announcement of the union and the official marriage ceremonies. |
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